I gotta tell ya friends, developing and maintaining a regular writing schedule with consistency is hard, so very hard. Maybe it’s not hard for you veteran writers, but lately the struggle is real for me. Recently I have resisted writing the real. I think the words, but find it such a challenge to wrestle them to the page. As I once heard Andi Cumbo-Floyd talk about “holding good boundaries”, I have not been doing that very well with my creative life. It’s been violently bumping heads with my general and work life, and my words and creativity have suffered – seething under my skin pressing on my heart to be written, seen, heard, and expressed.
Real talk friends, the clutter is now at critical mass, and I must, MUST deal with it now so I can move forward and be wholeheartedly healthy. What does that even mean? It sounds like esoteric, pie-in-the-sky foolishness, but at a gut level it means getting whole and well and right. It means tackling the hard stuff – not going over it, not around it, not under it, but through it. This space isn’t the place to talk about all the details of the clutter. I have safe friends I can talk to about all the yucky stuff. All I know is facing the clutter is step one to overcoming and getting better. It’s a step toward more authentic living.
Clutter, for me, is any and everything that gets in the way of living and thinking and being free from the inside out. It can be clutter of thought, clutter of physical things, clutter of activity, etc. You know what your clutter is and how it’s blocking your life. Mine just happens to be internal. So here I am writing about it on my site because the reality is that I cannot ignore it. It’s staring me down, all up in my face like a master drill sergeant trying to intimidate me into submission. It’s not working, but what does occur to me is the need to listen to my life, to listen to the incessant whispers acting like naughty children who just want to be loved rather than ignored, to listen to the true longing of my soul – those are the things I need to hold space for.
It’s not that I want to embrace the foolishness of the clutter, but I do recognize the importance of sorting through it to know what is mine to keep and to throw off what is not mine. It’s all mental clutter, but it’s also sifting words, phrases, dreams, and ideas to clear my mind and heart. To be even more honest with you, I have to do this work so I can get to my own roots. I’ve been borrowing other people’s ground long enough, and my own roots are gasping for their own airy dirt. I want to live rooted and grounded, and that’s really difficult to do when the ground is covered in the junk other people’s dreams, visions, ideas, and such. I’m clearing it out.
I don’t know what the process is going to look like. I have no idea where it’s going to lead. I can’t explain the ramifications of decluttering. I only know that it will make me feel better, have a clearer sense of purpose, and get rooted in truth. I need that now more than ever. I’m willing to uproot what is no longer or never was mine, so I can live free, without hesitation, and with courage.
I offer no advice, no three step plan, or magic pill of any kind. I only offer this appeal to you: consider what things keep you from living life fully free. Where do you need to declutter?